For a while, a long while really, I was not able to read. I didn’t have the focus, the patience, or the time. I couldn’t really do much in terms of writing, though I did post regularly to my old blog. My diagnosis got in my way. My illness took away my concentration. I felt the desire to read, but whenever I sat down to do it, I just gave up.
There were times I had an immense pull to create and I would write things I felt contained a ton of passion though they were just too manic to really amount to anything, and there were several starts to books in the past where I just gave up. I just didn’t have the concentration to really commit to a project so large and overwhelming.
A few hospitalizations later, and I feel mostly normal most of the time. I am reading all the time now, as much as I can. I read about a book a week, unless they are really big, thick sci-fi books. I LOVE to read now. I love to write as well. I feel I lucked out with meds that do what they are supposed to. It has been a tough road. In the past I would only be able to focus on spiritual books that I re-read a bunch of times.
I stuck with it though.
I read all of the Harry Potter books, The Stand, It, and a couple other books by Stephen King. I read two Game of Thrones books and will continue the series. I read some beat writers, William S. Burroughs, Jack Kerouac, Hunter S. Thompson. I read more sci-fi stuff, Isaac Asimov, Anne McCaffrey, etc. I read all of Edgar Allen Poe and all of H.P. Lovecraft, and I continue to look for more to read all the time. I love it. And the more concentration I had and the more I soaked in, the more I wanted to write my own books.
As it goes, I was able to commit to one project long enough to finish to the best of my ability. And though I didn’t have all the support in the world, it was something I always kind of wanted to be able to do. In my novel, which I think will be a series of three, I cover Bipolar Disorder, fantasy, and sci-fi elements as well as some themes about violence, duty, and societal beliefs. I mostly had fun with the project, though there were times it was tough to put things into words on a page.
I must’ve went through six different drafts and editing and reworking. I read through it countless times, fixing things every chance I got. To actually get to hold in my hands a book that I lovingly crafted for a couple years, I was happy that I was finally able to get something done as big as that.
Please check out the book on Amazon.